How to Give Your Children a Positive Message When Disciplining Them
Avoid telling your children what they should have done in order to avoid the offense. By using the word “should,” you are not only reminding them of their mistake but you are also leaving them with no options to correct it. Your reproach should not be about what they should have done, but about positive action they can take in the future to avoid the same mistake.
For example, if your child was supposed to call you when he or she got to a friend’s house but they failed to call, saying that they should have called does nothing to help the situation. Instead, tell them they are not allowed to go over a friend’s house until they remember to call. This way you are getting rid of the problem by making calling a habit.
Try using punishment as a time to get your children involved with positive activities. If your child’s grades are falling, make studying a part of the daily routine. If you children have problems with sibling rivalries, try to engage them in activities that the whole family can enjoy together. Above all, make sure the punishment fits the crime.
For a free report on the four secrets “putting an end to the tears and frustration of back to school and homework” write to Solomon_Brenner@comcast.net
Contributed by Solomon Brenner, author of Black Belt Parenting, Master Instructor of Action Karate
